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NU CHO, VOT MOI ANEKDOT, TOLKO NA ENGLISH, NETU RUSKI KEYBOARD.

Court room, judge presides.
bailif brings in a duck.
judge--J duck 1-d1 duck2-d2 duck3--d3

j: what is your name and what is your crime?
d1: quack, your honor, i am accused of blowing bubbles in public.
j: that is no crime, dont flood my courtroom with this nonsence.

After few mins another duck is brought in,

J: what is your name and your crime?
D2: squack your honor, i am accused of blowing bubbles in public
j: (angry tone) i already said its no crime!, i dont wanna see any
more ducks in my courtroom

After few mins another duck is brought in

J: let me guess, blowing bubbles in public again?
D3: no your honor, i am bubbles.

Tourist comes to Borjomi in Georgia, and walks around the hotel resort.
he walks into some room with 3 buttons.

Button 1------local rivers.
button 2------local mountains.
button 3------local traditions.

so he presses button 3 and comes out local guy, 2.2mx1.5 and says,
i gotta fuck you, the tourist is freaked out

Is it really nessesary?
Yes it is, but you have option, with vaselin or without?

Tourist says: offcourse with vaselin.
"hey Vaselin, get your ass over here"